But I want to take this time to honor the caregivers of children with special needs.
As a mother, I love unconditionally,I sacrifice all things and most mother's do this. But when you stop to think about it-just your child's smile or hug or them telling you they love you,is more reward than the average parent can imagine-when your child might not be able to give you even that back.
My daughter has come so far in the last year,but for the longest time-she wouldn't respond in any way-when I'd smile at her. She was a happy,bubbly,awesome kid-she just couldn't process that the thing to do was to return the smile. Today,as I was putting her down for a nap. I kept closing my eyes,pretending to be asleep;so she'd stop playing and go to sleep. I opened my eyes and she was still staring at me,so I smiled...and she gave me a sheepish grin back. Oh well,I say! And then we smile back and forth and giggle a little. Do you know the strength of heart and absolute pure love it takes a care giver to never stop smiling and never stop trying to win that smile back?
Earlier this morning,I'd ask her to give me a hug and she'd say, "No!" But then she'll just hug or kiss me and it's the best feeling in the world. When she finally understood affection,it meant every thing to me;because she finally knew to give a hug because she loved somebody. This simple gesture many parents might do in passing with their children throughout the day,can make the day or week of a parent with a special needs child!
And to just hear, "Mommy or Daddy." You don't know how that feels to go years and not hear an utterance of your name. You just keep loving and giving and pouring out your life,but you would give anything to hear an "I love you,Mom." Now,when my daughter pulls at me and yells my name 30 times,in every variation known to man. I can only smile and stop what I'm doing,because it took me years to hear her call my name.
This is a blessing. thanks for sharing. My son is 5. He has autism,sensory intergration disorder, feeding disorder, severe ADHD, chronic lung disease, GERD,sleep disorder,too.
ReplyDeleteI knew when he was an infant something was different. He never responded as a baby should. My son was born 15 weeks early, Weighing 1 lb. 3 oz. So I knew there would be some slight delays. However, this was different and not delays. I had to shelter him the first two years. He was on oxygen and monitor 24/7, so his immune system weak. He would get sick easily, still does. At the age of two, he still would not make eye contact, no gestures, no verbal, no touching, would not socialize with others. Never played with all the age appropriate toys. He only fixiate on my front loader washer, ceiling fans, open and close cabinets for hours on, never messing with the items inside, banging on dryer, his head,etc.
We, too, days of appointments and therapy. ABA has helped. He is 5. He is verbal now. Although not social with children but maybe a minute max. He is with adults. Public outting is still a nightmare, meltdowns and fixiation on lights, switches, fans, people seem to over power him. We finished an eight week feeding program at the Marcus Autism Center this past December. He is now eating over 30 different foods, all which I have to puree. Before, he would only eat one pudding. He still does not know how to chew, but main problem is the sensory aversion to texture. He is a non self feeder, and still has no self help skills. This is to sum up a few accomplishments. as you know many other challenges there is.
Matthew, my son, is my heroe, inspiration. He has taught me the true meaning of life. He is a miracle. Never take those little things for granite. I cherish his hug, even though its a second. I cherish the occassional eye contact. I cherish every little thing he does.
I would like to share though, that he is on a medicine called Buspirone. I mean he is on many meds but this one is different. He is been taking almost a year. His verbal took off on this medicine. When he starts giaining weight, you can tell the med has to be adjusted. His speech starts slurring, and then hardly none. Adjust the medicine due to weight gain...speech comes back and then some, much more. Although some is not clear to others, it is to us. If you havent heard of this medicine, ask your doctor about. It is usually for adults for anxiety. However, is being given to young children with ADHD and autism.
WOW. I wish I could hug you. You have been through so much! I'm sorry it took so long for me to respond!! I too am actually on that medicine,for yes-anxiety! (Not hard to wonder why I'm anxious!) Please write me anytime!! ~Tabitha
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